Entertained?

Sometimes - but only sometimes - I am entertained by my blog.

First, the Google searches that bring people to my blog (hopefully, another fun post on that soon).  We all have those kooky phrases that get people here, but I bet none of you can beat this one:

Yes, that's right. SEXY MODEST CATHOLIC brought someone to my blog.

And now that I've typed it all together as a phrase in a post, I'm sure that it will bring even more people to my blog.

If you, dear reader, were brought here by searching for "sexy modest Catholic" on Google, I welcome you. You have found the classy lady for whom you seek. I hope you enjoy your stay.

In other news, I am always intrigued when I'm able to see all the places that land on my blog. The internet is pretty cool that people from all over the world can find little ole me.

I think my favorite visitor I've seen thus far has to be all the way from Cebu, Cebu City.

While I am sure that Cebu, Cebu City is a fascinating place, this is not why it is my favorite. 

This is why:

Anyone else having Veggie Tales flashbacks?

Excuse me, I have to go achoo-moo-moo.

Oh, but before I go, because I like it when my blog entertains me, I'll also leave you with this:

In case I don't say it enough, sus suaves movimientos son como mantequilla en un chango pelón.

Is Blog-aversary a Word?

Today marks my two year anniversary of blogging!

And Liesl said, "Let them eat cake!"
And they did. And everyone was happy. 

I know I have learned a lot in the past couple of years - about blogging, about Catholicism, about my own spiritual journey - but mostly I have enjoyed learning through interacting with all of you!

To celebrate, I thought I would highlight some of my posts over the past two years. I hope you enjoy taking a step back in time with me, and be sure to let me know what you would have picked as the winners of these categories!

And the Oscar goes to...

Most Read  - It was a pretty big surprise when I realized how many people were reading The Porn Post! It has over 1,600 views so far!

Most Comments - Is it any surprise that The Porn Post has the most comments?

Shortest - While I haven't figured out if there is an official way to calculate this, I would have to say that the quickest and shortest post I've ever written was Be a Window.

Let's get real. I bend over backwards trying not
to write a 500 page novel for each post...

Longest - Every. Single. Post. I've. Ever. Written. Just kidding... (not really). Sometimes, I think I should've been a novel writer. Again, I don't know the official way of figuring this out, but I would say that the ones that took me the longest to write and thus ended up being way longer than I wanted to be were: The Porn Post and Spiritual Dry Spells, Part 1 & Part 2 (which were originally supposed to be one long post, but ended up as two because it was so long... so yea, I think it can win the longest post award).

Most Controversial - I would've thought that The Porn Post or The Largest Genocide our World has Ever Seen would have been the most "controversial", but I think based on the comments I got, Sharing Secrets was the most "controversial"!

Most Personal and Honest - I think many of the posts about my Spiritual Dry Spell could win this category, but I think the most honest was The Desert. It was the hardest post to hit "Publish" when I finished, but it was also the one I was the most glad that I did hit "Publish".

My Favorite - It really is tough to pick my favorite(s) because if I published it, I probably enjoyed writing it!  Many of those that I've listed here would be in my top ten list!

Funniest - I like to think that all of my posts are funny... aren't they? Because I often find myself making people laugh when I wasn't even trying, I'd love to hear what you thought my funniest post was, because honestly, I can't really pick one! I know that I definitely enjoyed some good laughs while writing Excuse Me While I Swoon, but then I usually get a good chuckle out of a lot of what I write.

No problemo crying at this age.

The One that Made Me Weep Like a Wee Babe - Honesty, I don't know if I've ever really wept while writing or reading any of my posts, although there have been a few where I teared up or wanted to cry. I think I probably teared up writing The Desert and I know that I wanted to cry while writing The Coach, but sometimes we find the catharsis we need in the places we least expect!

Most Catholic - I don't really know what this means (and yes, I made these categories up) since most of my posts are about CATHOLIC things, but I think Why Mary?, St. Joe, My Beau, Submit to Being Submissive are all viable options!

Biggest Surprise - This award goes to the post that got a lot of reads, but I could never figure out why! And the winner is... Why Mary? with 488 reads!

The One that Went Unnoticed - I thought that The Coach would get a comment or two, but it hasn't had too many page views. I think the timing of my post was just off - it happens!

Bringin' sexy back since 1986.

Most Likely to Snag Me a Man - If I'm trying to snag a good holy man, perhaps Patience: A Call to Holiness is a good one. If I'm trying to snag a regular old Prince Char, Excuse Me While I Swoon is a great one. Or, if I'm trying to snag a man that thinks smart ladies who don't wear makeup are sexy, then  Bringin' Sexy Back is a winner!

Most Likely to Make Said Man Run Away in Fear - Since I only blog about beer, sports (hockey), and never about emotions, I can't even imagine me writing anything that would make said man run away in fear... Nothing at all... (unless said man is the jealous type, because, you know, St. Joe is my beau)

I love comments, so comment away! What posts do you think fit into these categories?

Better yet, leave me a link to a favorite post that you've written, so I can continue learning from you all as I step into another year of blogging!

To Be a Saint

I came across a post I wrote last year called The Message of Love:

...I'm not talking about the sappy kind of love that pervades our culture today. I'm talking about real love, as in the "let us love one another, because love is of God" and "God is love" (1 John 4:7,16) kind of love. 

It all comes down to how we define love, which we read more about in St. Paul's letter to the Romans. Many non-Catholics (and unfortunately, even some Catholics!) would cite this passage as evidence that we no longer have to follow the ten commandments given to Moses by God, in the saying that we "owe nothing to anyone, except to love one another; for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law." (Romans 13:8) Adultery? Coveting? It's okay if I do these things as long as I do them because of love. 

Yet, what does Paul mean when he says to love one another? By whose standards should we love? My standards? Your standards? The standards followed by the president of the United States? No, we are commanded to love by God's standard. This means loving the entire person, where "love does no evil to the neighbor." (Romans 13:10)

Read the rest...

I find that we as Catholics have to constantly be reminding ourselves of what it means to Love, and what it requires of us to love by God's standards. No, it's not always easy, but we are all called to speak the Truth, especially in the current state of our society.

We have to remember that Catholics are so very blessed. We belong to the Church that Loves us, wholly and completely, and wants the best for us. We belong to the Church that wants us to get to Heaven. Sometimes, that means the Church has to say no to us. Even us Catholics don't always like it, but we have to remember that this message of the Church is always one of Love.

Recently, the Church, her leaders, her shepherds, including my priest, and her followers have come under attack for standing up for Truth and speaking out against things such as abortion, contraception, and gay marriage. In the past few weeks even, how many of us have been called intolerant and judgmental bigots, when all we are trying to do is Love the whole person? I found this quote from Peter Kreeft, and I pray that this is the message that we send to the world:

The Church is the best friend of homosexuals, both because she tells them they are made in God's image and have intrinsic dignity and rights and are called to be saints, and because she is the only social force left that insists on moral absolutes. So when they sin against themselves she says NO, just as she does to heterosexuals who sin against themselves sexually, but when others sin against them she says NO also. No one else dares to say NO. She speaks up for everyone, including homosexuals. Source

We are all sinners. Every single one of us. I'm a sinner! But, we are all worth it.

As my favorite Catholic radio host would say, "Be a Saint! What else is there?"

Christ died for each and every one of us, because we are all in need of a savior. He died for each of us because we are worth it. We are all called to spend eternity with Him in Heaven. The path to holiness is never easy, but it releases you from slavery when it is freely chosen. The Church Loves each and every one of us, for who we are in our entirety, and not by how society labels us. Yet, the Church also wants us to aspire to be the person we each were created to be. She is willing to lead us there - are you willing to accept that path?

Superheroes

Are you following the Bright Maidens yet?

Remember those cute little homework assignments you had in elementary school where you had to interview members of your family? We had to learn about where our parents grew up, what it was like growing up in the dark ages, how they met, and what their occupations were, among other things.

My dad sends these kinds of things
to us in emails... he's so funny...

My dad was easy to interview. I didn’t even have to ask him for the answer to his occupation - I just knew that he was a structural engineer. I didn’t know what a structural engineer actually did (besides sitting at a desk covered with lots of blueprints and that he was better/cooler than an architect), but I knew that was his job.

My mom proved to be more difficult. This is how it usually played out:

Me: Mom, what's your occupation?


Mom: Let's see... you should put doctor, cook, teacher, laundry woman, housekeeper, diaper changer, maid, taxi driver, errand runner, hair stylist, clothes picker-outer, grocery shopper, classroom mom, Girl Scout cookie mom, volunteer...


Me: Moooooooooooooooooom! You don't do all those jobs...

My little kindergarten brain thought she was joking. I knew that Dr. Sheets was my doctor and that Sandy cut my hair, so there was no way my mom was also those things. I'm sure I asked her what to really put down for her occupation. What I didn’t realize at my youthful age was that everything she listed as her occupation was 100% accurate.

Yep, my mom was and still is a stay-at-home mom, or SAHM (since acronyms are so cool). She never listed her occupation as “homemaker”. Yes, she “made a home” but so did my dad by going off to an office every day to earn money.

With my limited view of the world as a child, I certainly didn’t realize that my mom was different from most of my friends' moms. I didn’t know that it was completely normal for moms to have full-time careers, and I certainly didn't remember when my mom worked (I was 3 when she made the major career change). I just thought it was normal that every mom was just a mom.

I’m not sure when I realized that this was not necessarily the case. I never had to worry about getting a ride home from after-school activities. I never had to worry about making it to softball games or Girl Scout meetings on time. I never had to wonder what was for dinner that night, or when my laundry would be clean. I never had to worry about sleeping through my alarm clock, because I had a back-up waker-upper. I didn’t have to worry if I missed the bus, because I would still get to school on time. All of these things just happened. This day-to-day assurance of the simplest things was a normal part of my life.

I didn’t realize how truly blessed I was to have my mom stay home for my sisters and me. I didn’t realize the sacrifices that my dad had to make to support our family of six, and I certainly didn't know about what my college-educated mom gave up to stay home with us.

So, I took it for granted. I would say that I appreciated what my mom did, but I could never see myself staying home as a mom because I would get bored. Yes, BORED. Can you believe it? I thought my mom sat at home all day bored!

I vowed that I would go off to college, and have a great and rewarding career someday – and be a mom, too. I thought I could do it all* – and I think that by thinking that, in a way I didn’t really recognize all that my mom really did.

*Moms who really do it all, with the career and the kids - y'all are super moms. I can barely take care of myself and work, I have no idea how you do it. 

I didn’t realize that stay-at-home moms are working moms. Somewhere along the way, society started to undervalue the role of the mother in our family lives. We began to think that women who choose the "1950s housewife" kind of life are somehow not living up to their potential as women, when really they are living out the feminine genius just as much as the moms who are doctors, lawyers, and teachers.  Yet, perhaps because of reality TV shows, society seems to have this idea that SAHMs as those who either have:

1. 20 kids, and spend their entire day changing poopy diapers...

Kids today are so technologically advanced!

OR

2. A nanny for their children because they are just far too busy having brunch at the club with the other "SAHMs".

It's called the single life... minus the whole go to work thing.

Super mom - saving the world
one stinky diaper at a time.

Thankfully, when I moved out to DC, truly “on my own” for the first time, I began to realize what a gift my mother had given me all those years. I began to re-think my views about SAHMs, and I no longer saw them as stroller-pushing, diaper-changing, sit-at-home-lazy-and-bored kind of women. I saw them as superheroes.

Seriously, all moms should have a cape. 

You should get one at the hospital after you give birth.

I'm totally not kidding.

As I grew deeper into my faith, I also realized how much I longed for that life. I was a little shocked with myself when ambitious, always-wanted-to-have-a-super-awesome-high-paying-career me realized that I might actually want to follow in my mom's footsteps. It was this realization that helped me realize that whether a mom stays home to raise her children or goes out into the world to work, she is still a working woman. Even more, they are all still moms whether or not they get a real paycheck, and their jobs are arguably the most important jobs ever.

Adding "juggler" to the list of mom occupations.

Some smart guy somewhere calculated that the average SAHM should make around $115,000 per year for the amount of work she does. That’s a really nice salary, if you ask me, but I can tell you that my mommy did not get that sizeable paycheck every two weeks.

She got nosebleeds and scraped knees, baskets of dirty laundry, poopy diapers galore, tears at home and temper tantrums at the grocery store.

But, she also got bouquets of dandelions (we thought they were pretty flowers!), handprint impressions of all shapes and sizes, homemade cards and photo frames covered in macaroni, beautiful drawings plastered all over the basement door, too much help cooking and baking, and lots of laughter and smiles.

Maybe you can’t buy a house or a car with these things, but I would say their value is even better than that $115,000 salary that my mom deserves.

I don't know if I'm called to be a mom (I suppose I need a husband to accomplish that!), and I don't know if I'm called to be a stay-at-home mom. What I do know is that a few years ago, I would have scoffed at the thought of giving up my really nice salary to be a stay-at-home mom. Now, if that's where God is calling me, I would be happy to say that I'm  a cook, doctor, laundry woman, taxi driver, etc. etc. etc., just like my mom. I might have to ask to borrow her superhero cape, though.

The Coach

The following stems from a small part of a homily I heard last night at a Healing Mass. The priest said in terms of healing that "God never heals you just to sit out out on the bench" - and I took this metaphor and ran with it.

Take me out to the baaaaaaall game!

I used to be afraid of playing softball.

I think it stemmed from a fear of being hit by the ball. That evolved into being afraid of messing up and missing a catch, making the wrong play, and especially striking out at the plate. I relished the times when I went up to the plate and was greeted with four balls, meaning I got to easily walk to first base. I was that girl that the coach stuck in right field and at the end of the line-up, because my lack of confidence was holding me back.

Going to a hitting camp one summer and making the school team that next year gave me some more confidence, and I found myself using the skills I'd always had and improving on my game. I was even a little surprised to see that while I had been stuck in right field for so long, I was actually pretty good at playing in the infield when I was given the chance to play other positions. I still play in the infield to this day.

Even more, I started to find myself not afraid of stepping up to the plate and even excited by the idea of getting to hit the ball. Even though I didn't always make it on base, I moved from the end of the lineup to the beginning, because my coach told me that having someone who wasn't afraid to take a swing at the first pitch was just what we needed to start off the game. While I no longer lead the lineup on my adult team, I do hit the ball almost every time I'm up at the plate, even if it means getting out at first so that the runners in front of me can advance on the bases.

I needed to gain some confidence in myself, but I also had to come to recognize my role on each of the teams with which I have played. It took these things to help make me a better player, allowing me to use my skills to help the team conquer. It isn't about me making a great play or hitting it out of the park, but about what I do that helps my team win the game in the end.

So what about playing for God's team?

Has the fear of striking out or getting hit by the ball ever kept you from stepping up to the plate?

What about the pain, suffering, and confusion you've encountered in the game?

Sometimes it feels like I'm reading the signs from my third base coach (i.e. God),  and I think I know exactly what He wants me to do and so I just go for it - all in. It's only when I strike out, get hit by the ball, just get beat out by the catch at first, or watch that left fielder make a spectacular over-the-shoulder catch when I realize that what I thought I saw down that third base line wasn't really the sign that Coach was giving me.

Frankly, it feels like a wild pitch straight to the face. Or to the heart.

Oomph! Thanks for that pitch.

So what do I do when this happens? Thinking Coach is about to put me on the bench for the mistakes I've made, I just go ahead and bench myself to save Him the trouble. Yet, once again, this is reading the signs all wrong, and by doing this, I keep Him from putting me back into play where He needs me. I keep myself on the bench, not quite sure where to find healing, when really I need to get back into the field to find what I seek.

God doesn't allow me to experience pain and suffering just to sit me out of the game. He doesn't let my heart get broken, and then leave me alone to heal. He is there to coach me through the pain, wanting to heal me.

Aw, he's too cute to be benched!

I have trouble letting God coach me through the pain, though, especially when I hold onto the idea that He led me there with those crazy baseball signals. (Wait, did He touch the brim of his hat to indicate an actual signal or was it just a signal to throw off the other team... now I'm confused!) Even when I turn to Him, I still have a difficult time completely opening myself up to His comforting words and healing grace. I don't know why - because I beg for for my heart to be open to healing - but I just continue to keep myself on the bench, guzzling my water, spitting sunflower seeds, and trying to do what I can to nurse my bumps and bruises, all the while wishing I could be back out in the field. Yet, while I'm sitting here doing this, Coach is just trying to give me the signals to heal me. He doesn't want to do this just to keep me on the bench. He wants to heal me to put me back into the ball game.

Why? God is the Coach. He is the best Coach out there, but He needs me to go out and actually play the game for Him. There's only so much a coach can do to lead his team to victory, because He can give us all the right signals and coaching tips, but we have the freedom to choose otherwise or choose to see what we think we want to see. Unfortunately, we are playing the toughest team out there, and they are led by a mischievous and relentless coach (i.e. Satan), and Coach can't afford to let His team sit on the bench. He needs me to play my hardest, to do what I can to help the team win the game.

He needs me to go up to the plate. He needs me to bat again for Him. He needs me to take some swings for others. He needs me to be a witness, to show others that despite the mistakes I make in the game, despite the times I get hit and fall to the ground, broken and weak, I can still heal and come back even stronger. He needs me to let Him pick me back up. He wants to heal me and give me another chance to help the team. He needs me to do this to help bring others to Him.

Imagine the kind of home run welcome you'd have if God
were your baseball coach! AWESOME!

I can't be afraid to go to the plate to bat again. Not just go to the plate, and stand there, and hope for a walk - I have to go to the plate, ready to swing away. Ready to take some hits. Ready to take a chance on striking out. I have to be ready and willing to take these risks for the chance that I'll hit it out of the park. He needs me to take those risks if I'm going to play for His team. Sometimes He needs me to help bring others home to Him - to bat them around the bases and score some runs - even if it means making a sacrifice play and getting out myself. This is the call of a team player, and in being a follower of Christ, we are all called to be team players.

Blessed Mother Teresa said, "Let God use you without consulting you. Give God permission." I have to let Him heal me so that He can use me for the next big play. I shouldn't have to give Him permission, but He will wait for me to say, "Yes" to whatever play He calls. I have to let him use me to do what's best for the team, and I have to trust in His coaching.

I don't know what the next play is going to be, or even what kind of play Coach is going to call. As I wait, I am trying to learn to be more accepting and open to the trials, suffering, and mistakes - and the eventual healing - that I will continue to encounter in this game. Hopefully, I will learn the signals that will bring me across that home plate, where God the Coach is waiting, with a jumping high five, to say, "Welcome Home!"

This is how excited Coach gets when you come back to the game!

Jesus the Romantic

I've been feeling the oh-so-sweet sting of singleness a bit more than usual lately. Tonight at Mass, I was feeling down about being alone, and I just looked up at the crucifix. I asked Jesus to help give me the peace and happiness of belonging to him and him alone for right now.* I asked him to send me a good and faithful man when the time is right; a man who seeks God and ends up finding me, too (package deal!). I asked him to woo my heart (because apparently dying on the cross for me hasn't been enough to convince me that he loves me) to help me fall even more in love with him.

As I was driving home, I was listening to some of my favorite music in the car, and I thought, "I wish some guy would sing this song to me..." And then it hit me that I have Someone even better - Jesus singing those songs to me!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Jesus knows how to woo a lady.

Here are just a few of the songs that I pictured Jesus singing to me tonight. I hope you too can feel Jesus working to romance your heart a little bit during this Easter feast!

When do you most feel Jesus working hard to win you over?

*Yes, St. Joe is still my beau, for those of you who are wondering. But I'm not cheating or anything because St. Joe is totally cool with Jesus being my boyfriend. I know this because 1.) St. Joe is the man, and 2.) He was totally cool with Mary being the spouse of the Holy Spirit. He's just not the jealous type! Plus, whenever he is beau-arific with me, he's really just pointing me closer to Jesus anyway.

No Greater Love

The greatest expression of love is Christ on the cross.

Christ of Saint John of the Cross by Salvador Dali

The greatest response we can give in return?

"I love you, too."